I Read This Book - You Have To Read It Too!

I read quite simply what I believe is one of the best books on parenting and I can't wait to share with you my thoughts on it. Once a month I do a post about books, and today's book is so good, that it is the only one I'm featuring. Stay tuned.

First off I want to say, this is not a book about disciplining your children, this book is not Bible based, and you won't be needing to take any extra trips to the store for items suggested. I also firmly believe that the core truths of this book would do a wonder of good for anyone - not just parents.

The book - "Simplicity Parenting" Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids." by Kim John Payne, M.Ed

I am in no way receiving credit, funds, or any kind of payback for promoting this book. I was inspired by it's pages and want to pass along my great find! 

Here it is, in all it's library stickered glory! 

“When your child seems to deserve affection least, that’s when they need it most.” 

* * * 

So if this book isn't about discipling children what is it about? Discipling parents. Parents are the ones in charge of the child's time, the home's intake of toys and clothes, and they manage the schedule. So while disciplining your child's attitude and behavior is important, discipling yourself to create a lovely, peaceful environment is sometimes much harder. 

* * * 

Unspoken lessons that advertisements teach us, and particularly our children:

1. To be unhappy with what we have

2. “ I am the center of the universe and I want what I want now.”

3. Products can solve complex human problems, and meet our needs

4. Buying products is important

These messages, overtime create both a sense of entitlement, and a false reliance on purchases rather than people to satisfy and sustain us emotionally.

* * * 

The book is a good length, and each chapter I got to I was sure that the author would simply be repeating himself, or dragging on, but every time I started reading into a new chapter the information was new, applicable, and the stories of success were wonderful to envision. 

* * * 

“As you decrease the quantity of your child’s toys and clutter, you increase their attention and their capacity for deep play” 

* * * 

Here are a few of the topics that interested me the most: 

1) Less screens

2) Creating Routines

3) Drastically reducing toys and clothing choices (this includes books) 

4) Family Dinners

5) Talking Less

* * * 

“My daughter made a simple observation. She pointed out something that struck her in someway, something she wanted to share. I did not need to take that moment and “make it into something” of my own design. I didn’t need to enrich her observation, to repackage it was a lot of information or praise or verbiage, and handed back to her, with my stamp on it, or ribbons attached. As her father, I don’t have to make every moment a “teaching moment”, or even a “special moment”. I can often just notice.”

 * * * 

When you read this book, be prepared to be called to action. You can't read it passively, you must be ready to roll up your sleeves and do a little purging, downsizing, schedule rearranging , agenda canceling. The rush of our world is pulling people apart, as we all try to be apart of everything we increasingly become apart of no one. 

 * * * 

“Social skills can’t be stimulated by technology. In a world that increasingly relies on various forms of technology, none of which involve human touch, we find ourselves even further removed from one another.”

“Meaning hides in repetition: We do this every day or every week because it matters. We are connected by this thing we do together. We matter to one another. In the tapestry of childhood, what stands out is not the splashy, blow-out trip to Disneyland but the common threads that run throughout and repeat: the family dinners, nature walks, reading together at bedtime, Saturday morning pancakes.”

 * * * 

After reading through this book, I put some more toys into the 'toy library', I weeded out my clothes and kids clothes, I purged broken and uncreative toys, I rethought our schedule and routines, I even got rid of some books. I plan on buying the book and reading it again with a pencil in hand. The quotes I listed here are just a few of the many that caught my attention. 

If you read the book, let me know what you thought of it, how it inspired you to change, and the effect it had on your children and you.

Sarah